Empty

The house seems lifeless and dull without Cisca. I feel a void in the room where she usually is. Earlier I mistook the white chair inside for her. Everything seems so silent and solemn. I hope she's doing well in the veterinary clinic. She seemed to still be strong when we took her. I guess the timing of our adoption was just right. She could have died of the continued Ivermectin shots applied to her where she was being taken care of before. I just miss her.

I seem hollow inside. The joy and excitement has faded out. My responsibilities and the feeling of being loved  and needed are gone. I wish she was here and in perfect health. I feel numb right now. I need her love, her yelps to go out to relieve herself. All the joys and pains of puppy parenthood are gone. I still dream about her, that she's be back healthy, this week. Our dog food for her kidney maintenance is going to cost us 700 Philippine Pesos per two weeks. Ouch. I think it'll be for a lifetime. It's worth the price. I shouldn't have played "Come What May" from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack on youtube yesterday. I know God has a plan for us. I just have to trust him with whatever happens.